Wednesday, October 31, 2018

October 31st Halloween!

Happy Halloween!
I love this holiday.
I think its because it heralds the "holiday season".
The weather is changing,
and the time is changing....
(well, not till November the 4th)
and the little ones are so excited to
consume mass quantities of sugar.
And the slightly cool occult undercurrent of it
makes for an interesting night.
Its believed that the current traditions have stemmed
from ancient Celtic and Gaelic harvest festivals
of Samhain.
They usually disguised themselves as spirits,
to ward off any ill effects during the harvest.
They believed that during that time of year,
they could convene with the dead.
It was best done around the witching hours.
They felt that most of the apparitional
experiences were sensed between midnight and 2am.
This was a Pagan celebration.
Once the Celtic and Gaelic people became
Christian, the church turned those old festivals into
 All Souls Day and All Saints Day.
So, in the years since I was a kid and costumed in an old sheet
with eye holes cut out,
a homemade witch
or a Beatnik,
(don't judge, it was the late '50's early '60's)
this holiday has been "consumerized".
Every store has decorations,
the big box specialty Halloween stores pop up
to entice parents into buying "fancy",
one time use, costumes,
and the candy makers ramp it up.
But...
I still love the goofiness of this day.
****************************************************
 

The girls are enjoying some cut up cabbage.
That's Lucy, Sandy and Henny.
The other girls didn't partake.
They still aren't laying.
This is the second time I've had to buy eggs.
The CEO is thinking of a barbeque.....
Oh! My!
Apparently their egg strike isn't unusual.
We've been checking out various agriculture sites,
and they all say the same.
Just wait it out.
Heavy sigh........
C'mon girls give us a break!
 
*************************************
Just when we were about to write off the veggies for this year,
we got a pleasant surprise.
The vine has about 6 small Mirlitons
 .
This unusual looking plant is
Patchouli.
Its supposed to be great at repelling mosquitoes.
So far, so good.
Has that nostalgic smell too. 😁
The Stevia, mint, oregano, basil and rosemary are
doing well, because the hens don't eat them.
Yay!
The tomatoes and bell peppers didn't fare well this year,
a combination of the girls munching on the plant and the veggie,
and the weather.
It was way too hot!
 
********************************
The best dog in the whole world wasn't doing well.
She had an eye and ear infection.
She has diabetes, so its pretty easy to get these
opportunistic bugs.
Her left eye has some drainage and her ears were itching her.
She has a cataract in her right eye and small benign
growths on her left bottom eye lid,
but these are existing conditions
and had nothing to do with her current problem.
The meds we had to combat infections weren't working,
so off to the vet she went.
2 antibiotic eye drops,
1 oral antibiotic,
and
she's back to her silly self.
She still has a droopy left eye.
Its getting better every day.
Here, she's on the prowl for dinner.
She usually eats twice a day, morning and evening.
This was taken around 6pm.
"So, Mom, where's my dinner???"
****************************
 
*****still tweaking Boudreaux *****
 the Little Cajun Ghost.
I keep rewriting it.
 
*****************************
 
And in keeping with the holiday...
The penultimate line from an old Scottish poem....
From ghoulies and ghosties
And long legged beasties
And things that go bump in the night,
Good Lord, deliver us!
 
and
 
 
From Dante's poem, Inferno,
the inscription over the gates of hell....
"Abandon all hope, ye who enter here!"
 
(I might put that over the coop.....)
There's a lotta poop!
No hope of not getting it on your shoe.
Just sayin'
 
 
 
 
Whatever you are,
be a good one.
                                       Abraham Lincoln
 
 

Tuesday, October 9, 2018

October 9th

I got up this morning around 4:30am.
Not unusual, but I simply couldn't remember the date.
I originally thought it was my sleep deprived mind,
or my elderly brain.
Turns out, I think it just wholly stems from my
dependence upon electronic devices.
My digital clock displays the correct time, date and temperature of the room,
but I was reluctant to turn it on.
The CEO, was still blissfully asleep and the damned clock
glows an exterrestrial bright blue that would wake the dead!

I gave in to technology years ago when I purchased the clock.
First off, it's battery powered. In case of an outage, I wouldn't be late to work.
Second, it's an atomic clock. Sounds grand and slightly dangerous, but
I don't have to reset it when the time changes.
It automatically does it mysteriously at 2am.
How do I know that?
I stayed awake to make sure the clock changed so not to be late.
Yeah, I'm odd.

I digress.......
Anyway....
I consulted another electronic device, my phone.
Yay! Date and time, right there waiting for me.
What happened to the good old days of wind up, illuminated clocks,
wall calendars and dial phones???
All that gave way to progress?
Sometimes I question that.

All that got me to thinking. A kind of "remember when" nostalgia.

We didn't have much growing up, and I've touched on this before,
but we were unaware of it.
No allowance.
I don't remember a burning need for money either.
As I became a teenager, there was things I wanted to buy,
so we did chores and earned some money.
I had a part time job at 16, and gave my Mom most of my check.
As it turned out, she saved much of my paycheck so I could use it for a car later.
How clever of her.

I did love TV. We watched as a family quite a bit of the time.
Mama, Grandma, and us two girls.
Saturdays, we watched Saturday Hop
with John Plea.
He was soft spoken, tried to appear hip, and all around nice guy persona.
We listened and sang along to the current songs we heard on WTIX,
on our battery powered transistor radios.
The Hop is how New Orleans learned to dance.
That was no small feat to teach 2 teenaged girls with no rhythm.
 
Then there was Morgus!
I loved his campy show and dated horror flicks,
although my sister wasn't quite the fan that I was.
Poor old Chopsley, the strong silent side kick, and
Eric the Skull who spoke in a low baritone "Yes, Master",
peopled the slapstick scripts.
Occasionally, "guests" would be featured too.
 
Then, if a hurricane threatened our area,
we relied on Nash.
If Nash said we were safe from the onslaught,
then by God,
we were!
Yes, we all referred to him as Nash.
After all,
he came into our home every evening.
His marker was as ubiquitous as he was.
No fancy green screens,
No scripted banter.
All he needed was that map behind him.
He could have been Saint Nash,
for all my Mom and Grandmother thought of him.
The thing is.....
even before the power went out during Betsy in '65,
he never told his audience to leave.
He only conceded to remind the "low lying"
residents to make arrangements that they may have to evacuate.
 
When I was in college, we went to The Warehouse.
It was just as it sounds.
A warehouse.
No frills.
No seats,
  only a stage with lights in the rafters.
We either stood or sat on the floor.
(no idea who this is,
just a pic from their website)
The venue is no longer there.
We went several times in the '70's.
It was great. It was loud and smoky.
We saw Blood Rock,
Big Brother and the Holding Company,
and The Allman Brothers.
Funny thing is.......
I had no idea who Janis Joplin was at the time,
she was just the lead girl singer.
The Allman Brothers weren't really well known at that time either.
We didn't see the headliners.
Due to our collective lack of funds,
we went to the "cheaper" concerts.
Then, after Woodstock,
there were free concerts with mostly local bands,
in City Park at the driving range, now the Meadow.
We went a few times to those too.
Outdoors, sitting picnic style on an old throw rug.
 
All this reminiscing from not knowing the date.
Ha!
*********************************
 
The chicken girls are still not laying.
All are molting though.
I really shoulda collected their feathers.
They would have made a great down comforter.
I just keep sweeping them up and putting them in the trash.
Last year, my granddaughter saved a few and made a small feather duster.
It was doll sized, but I thought it was neat.
 
***********************************
 
My soap speaks Spanish
but it seems to be trying to tell me it's in pain.
How sad.
 
**************************

The best dog in the world,
lays with her paws crossed like this all the time.
Just to see if it was coincidence,
I uncrossed them.
She replaced them in this position.
Silly dog.
 
************************************
1st installment of my silly children's book
 
Boodreaux,
The Little Cajun Ghost
 
Today was October 31st.
There would be a full moon tonight.
Boodreaux was so excited.
He waited all year for Halloween.
It was his favorite time of year.
The spirits could walk with the living.
He loved the idea of Trick or Treating with the children.
They never screamed and ran from him on this night.
It was all laughter and fun.
It made him feel less lonely.
 
It was also the night of the annual All Hallows Eve Party!
Everyone in the cemetery would attend.
 
The skeletons and witches had been planning for weeks.
They had the graves decorated with Spanish moss,
and the old iron gates would groan nicely when opened.
The spiders contributed beautifully intricate webs across the tombstones.
The bats brought in dead flowers to adorn the walkways.
The fireflies would light the way.
Even the cranky old black cat agreed to be nice for the night.
It was going to be magical!
 
Boodreaux was so excited that he woke up his best friend,
ThibBoodeau.
"Wake up Thib!"
"We need to get ready!"
Thib was not as enthusiastic about Halloween.
He didn't care if the people were scared of him.
In fact he kind of liked it.
He liked to lurk behind a tomb and materialize right in front of
an unsuspecting visitor.
They'd scream and run.
Thib would roll around laughing.
The other spirits frowned on his behavior.
They said haunts should be dignified.
Not silly.
**********
 
Second installment coming soon.....
 
Critique it and let me know what y'all think.
If it turns out well enough,
I may try to self publish.
Any and all suggestions are welcomed....
 
**************
 

Monday, October 1, 2018

October 1st



Today is International Coffee Day.
On my caffeine restrictive, stomach issues, diet,
I'm not supposed to have any caffeine,
but, in honor of the day,
I'll celebrate with a small cup.
Its also National Hair Day.....
Well, that ship has sailed. Nothing much to be done there.
Oh, hey! Here's a day I can celebrate!
International Day of Older Persons!
Not sure of how to celebrate it though...
According to United Nations, back in 1990,
The good people in the General Assembly, decided to note
the achievements of seniors in their respective societies.
They felt that the valuable contributions of the aging,
to society are often overlooked.
According to their research, by the year 2030,
(in my head I sang... In the year 2525!)
the worldwide elderly population will increase to over 56%.
That's about 20%. Births are down and people live longer.
They decided to name today "UNIDOP" or,
United Nations International Day of Older Persons.
Just between us... I don't care for the acronym.
Sounds weird.
I wasn't consulted, so.......

*************************************
The CEO and I checked out a new breakfast buffet on Sunday.
(old people like buffets)

The food was good.
No, we didn't get a Mimosa or Bloody Mary.
It was a nice way to spend a rainy morning.
Typical breakfast fare, but they had pain perdu.
If you don't remember, its also known as Lost Bread
or just French toast made with French bread!
It was very tasty!
They even had seafood gumbo, catfish and red beans & rice!
Only in New Orleans.....
I recommend it.
There's also a neat little hole in the wall place on
West Napoleon called Daisy Duke's.
They serve a mean breakfast.
Fast and cheap.
Also recommended.
 
*****************************************
Speaking of oldsters,
My favorite person is Betty White.
A quick wit still in her 90's.
I've been watching reruns of The Golden Girls.
Although the scenery of their home is outdated, the show
content certainly isn't.
Between the four of them,
they embody the quintessential
"aging gracefully woman".
Yeah, it has some predictable goofy one liners,
but,
you instantly know that even with the put downs,
they love each other.
From Rose's innocent brilliance, Blanche's Southern Belle conceit,
Dorothy's weary daughter/caretaker role and Sophia's mischief,
it all works.
They hit the television mother lode where few other shows went.
My favorite is the interaction between Dorothy and Sophia,
and Dorothy's quick witted lines.
Shady Pines, Ma!
 
***************************
 
(my artsy picture of Lucy as a baby)
 
The chicken girls still aren't laying to capacity.
I have 4 eggs in the 'fridge.
4!
and that's from the last week!
Yesterday, we had a production meeting,
and I'm sorry to say that it wasn't well received.
Henny and Pepper didn't attend.
Hazel left before refreshments were served,
only to scurry back when the rumor that
dried worms and melon bits were on the menu.
I simply asked for fowl cooperation.
I also hinted that they'd be a raise in "pay"
for the girl whose output increased.
The girls that came to the meeting,
listened raptly.
Made me feel important.
(although, shortly after, I noticed them in a
huddle softly clucking and looking my way,
pointing at me with their wings and laughing!)
Probably planning how to increase the production.
Yeah, right.
While on an internet site that I often peruse,
Mother Earth News,
They suggested getting a small pumpkin for the hens
as a treat and a good way to get the needed vitamins and minerals
lacking in a late summer, early fall diet.
The insects aren't as plentiful as earlier.
That'll be my secret weapon.
Y'all lay eggs and I'll supply the pumpkin.
Deal?
***********************

On aging....
You know, there's a lot to be thankful for
and a lot that I take for granted,
I just have to look for it.
For example,
right now, I'm sitting here
typing (hunting and pecking),
and thinking how nice it is that
at least, my wrinkles don't hurt.
 
 
 

Sunday, September 23, 2018

September 23rd

 



Today is the autumnal equinox of 2018.
Or, the first day of Fall.
All it really means is that,
the Sun is directly above the equator,
and day and night are approximately equal in time.
This happens twice a year,on the vernal (spring) equinox and today.
Equinoxes and solstice' are directly related to the sun and seasonal changes.
The summer and winter solstice are marked by the sun being at the highest
in the summer with the longest day, and the lowest in winter, with the shortest day.
Hope that cleared it up for y'all.
But those changes never really come to the deep south.
Ha!
Yeah, I'm laughing!
The temperature outside now is 85, and it feels like 95 with the humidity.
We've been known to have 80 degree Christmas mornings!
I'm just tired of this oppressive heat.
The other day I went to pick up the grandkids from school,
and it was so hot!
How hot was it you ask?
This hot!
(an actual picture of me waiting at the gate for them to get outta school)
Really!
 
******************************
The hens, even though they are all molting,
are finding creative cool spots to hang out in the yard.
I guess because there is less feathers between their skin and the ground.
I usually do a head count whenever I'm outside,
just as a precaution.
If I can't find one of the girls, then I systematically look for her.
Ethel was MIA.
I'm calling her and looking everywhere the girls usually sit.
Nothing.
Not even a cluck.
So, I got out the big guns, the one thing they can't refuse,
their dried mealworms!
Its like crack to them.
I shook the container and they all came running!
Ethel, however, flew down from the ledge we have
a tape player on.
I never thought to look UP!
I guess it was cooler up there for her.
Also....
They need extra protein while they're replenishing their feathers,
so we give them a can of tuna weekly.
They'll gather around the can to eat it as soon as they can,
then run to drink water and find the coolest spot under the tree.
They avoid napping on the cement of the patio.
It probably feels like they are being fricassee'd.
 
**************************************
I couldn't sleep last night.
Not a new thing with me.
I couldn't turn my brain off.
I usually try to go back to sleep if I'm awakened,
(counting sheep has never worked, sorry fluffy guys)
but even after a trip to the bathroom,
a glass of cool water,
and turning my pillow to the cooler side,
I still tossed and turned.
Then I got too hot and threw off the covers,
and eventually decided to get up and read.
I don't like to turn any lights on to navigate
from the bedroom to the den,
but last night was very dark.
Thank goodness the Nook is backlit.
It served as a flashlight and I narrowly avoided
tripping over the dog,
breaking a hip and going to Rehab.
So.....
I read for a bit then crawled back in bed
around 5.
I slept till 8!
Yay for retirement!
I can finally sleep in if I want.
 
******************************
And remember....
 
and

 
 
😉

Sunday, September 16, 2018

September 16th

Today is National Wife Appreciation Day.
It's also National Cinnamon Raisin Bread Day
Coincidence?
I think not.
At least not in this house.
The CEO bought me cinnamon raisin bread on a grocery run,
so I'll take that as a "wife appreciation" kinda thing.


On another note....
We are about midway through this hurricane season.
The peak of the season to be exact.
The Atlantic season begins June 1st and runs to November 30th.
This is a list of this years' storm names.
I just hope we don't see the one on the last row, fourth from the bottom!
But, living in the Gulf South is a crapshoot as to whether
we are at ground zero or anywhere near a hurricane.
We are so attuned to this that we all have storm plans.
So, I say another rosary, praying for it to miss us.

**************************************

I was recently discussing The Hallmark Channel with my cousin.
I'm not particularly a fan.
That's partially because of the cookie cutter movies
with the actors who were nominally popular in the '80's,
and the fact that they begin Christmas movies in October.
Jeez!
I have watched a few of these movies hoping the main character
and the love interest reacted differently, but it never deviates.
I guess the writers just phone in the scripts and sit back to collect a check.
Hallmark announced that they are rolling out 34 new movies.
That's prolific even for them.
It'll either be a Prince falling for a career girl,
or a professional coming home to find the one that was left behind,
or a single parent caught up in life, not noticing the potential partner next door.
Am I right?
Maybe I should write for them?
Oh,
and don't get me started on The Disney Channel!
From their live action and animated shows, to the laugh tracks,
bratty kids with sarcastic comebacks and stupid dialog,
most of the fare is ridiculous.
I've watched many with my grandkids and
there is usually a laugh after every other line delivered,
and its never funny!
I looked online and those shows aren't even filmed in front of an audience.
Is Disney trying to make the audience think it is funny?
Nickelodeon is dumbing down their kids shows too.
Even the art work or animation is abominable.
Its sad that those shows are merely catering to the ad money, not
the enrichment of the viewers.
But, we should never underestimate the stupidity of humans,
or the purgative properties of a cup of coffee.
Just sayin'.

*******************************************


The chicken girls aren't laying as much these dog days of summer.
We only collect about 2 or 3 per day.
That is because some of them are molting.
That's when their old feathers fall out and new ones grow back in.
They typically lose feathers in a pattern. It starts at the neck,
then the body, wings and lastly the tail feathers.
We've seen it with them before, but it is still weird,
there are black and tan feathers all over the yard.
Reminds me of a pillow fight gone wrong.
They usually don't lay because all their internal resources
are geared to making new feathers, not eggs.
They also need higher protein feed during this process.
That's when we add the dried mealworms or yogurt.
They love it.

*******************************************
Some funnies to make you smile.

 
########
 
How do you find Will Smith in the snow?
You look for the Fresh Prints!
 
#########
 
I just got pulled over by a cop.
He asked if I had a police record.
Apparently Roxanne was not the correct response.
 
#########
 
All I'm saying is that at any point during
that ride through the desert he could have at
least given that poor horse a name.
 
#########
 
And speaking of stupid songs.....
Here's a few on my list.
 
Don't Worry Be Happy - gives me a headache
Feelings - because "woo-o-o feelings" makes me nauseated
Muskrat Love - complete with muskrat noises, why?
You Light Up My Life - makes blood sugar instantly rise
Afternoon Delight - seriously a song about sex and "sky rockets in flight"??
You and Me and a Dog named Boo - glamorous hobo life? get a job and don't steal eggs!
And I need to include....
My Sharona. - making stuttering a song style.
Anyone else got some of theirs?
Let me know.
 
Remember,
Be kind to animals,
kids
and
old people.
😁








Wednesday, August 29, 2018

August 29th

Last night before I went to sleep,
I reflected on the significance of today's date.
August 29th 2005.
Katrina.
A day that will certainly live in infamy.......  🌀

 
She made landfall the morning of the 29th as a
 category 3.
She had only just weakened to that.
The front right quadrant of the hurricane
smashed into Gulfport.
This is the area that sustains the strongest winds.
Our area got the tidal surges.
The levee systems that were supposed to protect
New Orleans and the surrounding areas were breached.
There were over fifty breaches in the levees!
After all, we live in a bowl below sea level.
But the flooding was the major cause of death and destruction,
on a scale that was unprecedented.
It took weeks to drain the bowl.
During all this, there were few who could be hailed as
heroes, but I need to mention a few.
My husband.
He stayed and saved our property, and some of the
neighboring properties from costly damage.
They had all evacuated
and only he and our dog stayed.
He was like Robinson Crusoe, stranded with no creature comforts.
 It was inevitable that some damage occurred,
but his quick thinking saved us from
the worst Katrina could have delivered.
The Coast Guard.
They began preparations 3 days before landfall.
They did land, water and air rescues untiringly.
I know that it is their job, but they
did it to their own peril at times.
They are truly the brave unsung heroes during that time.
My wonderful nephew is part of that number and
I'm so very proud of him!
And
The Cajun Navy
These plucky people took on the rescues of neighbors
in their own boats, before
anyone else could rally rescue efforts.
All this because of the abysmal failure of
local, state and federal government to
respond to the catastrophic events.
 
 
I speak of this as a kind of detached onlooker.
I was.
I spent 22 days at the hospital.
We had almost no communication with family and friends
outside the hospital.
I didn't know if my family was safe or not.
It wasn't quite the grueling conditions that some hospital workers
experienced but, it was stressful nonetheless.
My mettle was well and truly tested.
Our small band of nurses and doctors
completed some herculean tasks.
We managed to care for many patients,
and eventually evacuate some, but
sadly lost a couple.
We saw certain people shine and certain people
completely fall apart.
We had our own meltdowns due to stress as well,
but
with the compassion of our friends,
pulled it together,
slapped on a cheerful face and carried on.
All in all, it was an experience that I
would never want to live through again......
but I'm glad that I did
with those people that would always have my back.
They are not only coworkers but life long friends.
There's a line in the movie Steel Magnolias that says,
"That which doesn't kill you, makes you stronger"
So true,
So true.
****************************************
📚
Everyone who knows me
knows that I'm an avid reader.
Seems that its my second nature to have a book near.
I read for pleasure
and to keep my mind sharp.
With that said....
Most of my books come from Barnes and Noble's
online Nook account,
but I love to go to the "brick and mortar" store too.
There are hundreds to choose from, but
most of my "reads" are from the free books category.
I download them and if I get bored,
I simply delete the book.
No pain,
No gain
and best of all,
no cost.
But, I still love the feel and smell of a book.
Especially an old book!
That's why I love bookstores!
 I'd like to share some of my favorite ones.
📖
If you are ever walking in the Quarter,
enter this small bookstore.
The first thing you notice is the smell.
Old books!
I have only bought a book from here once,
but I become mesmerized at looking around.
I love this place!
 
Powell's Books,
an entire city block of books!
Its in Portland Oregon.
I credit my son with finding this awesome place.
I only spent a few hours perusing a fraction of their books,
but
I think I had an out of body experience!
This is truly the best bookseller in my limited opinion.
 
San Francisco has City Lights.
This bookstore is unique in that, it
kind of specializes in progressive politics.
Lets just say that it is a hippie icon as much as
the Height Ashbury area is.
It was founded in 1956 by Lawrence Ferlinghetti,
the Beat Poet and Peter Martin as an homage to
Charlie Chaplin's City Lights.
They published banned books!
They got arrested.
Seems ridiculous, but even today the
government and some groups try to dictate
what should or shouldn't be published and read.
Yay free speech prevailed!
 
Munro Books
On Government Street in downtown
Victoria BC
Another bookstore that I credit my son for finding.
As you can tell, this place is posh.
Their books can be pricy but the ambience is great.
The store was an old bank and they reflect the grandeur of that.
The thing that struck me upon entering,
was that everyone spoke in whispers.
It was like a library.
What a great place to spend a couple of hours!
 
Then there's the Jefferson Parish library.
What an amazing place!
All free.
Tons of books and even a coffee shop.
Quiet little reading/study rooms too.
And, remember to hush.
 
The take home message here is....
"The more that you read,
the more things you will know.
The more that you learn,
the more places you'll go."
Dr. Seuss
 
*********************************
Its thundering and my sweet girl is scared.
Any loud noises make her shake in fear.
She can't get up on the furniture anymore, so
when she came to me with that pleading look,
I boosted her up on the couch to lay next to me while I was reading
and she immediately calmed down.
She is our Golden Girl.
At almost 13, she's past her prime, but she is
the greatest dog I've ever had the privilege of knowing.
She's diabetic and has arthritic pain problems,
she's also almost blind,
but she sees with her heart.
And,
I can't think of anything more rewarding
than making the last years of a dogs'
life best they can be.
************************************
The chicken girls have been doing their chicken thing.
They comb the yard looking for edibles
as soon as they exit the coop.
🐛🐌🐞🐜
I cut up a watermelon the other day and put the cold rind
on the ground for them to nibble on.
A nice treat on a hot day.
They love it.
🍉
They'll eat it till all that's left is a small bit of the green skin.
An acquaintance that raises backyard chickens gives her flock
most of her table scraps, meat as well.
We don't do that, only compostable items.♻
But, the difference is, she eats her flock.
Nope!
Our girls are pets who happen to
give us their eggs.
I always apologize when I take an egg from under
one of them because
they think its their children.
🐣
Our broody hens have stopped brooding, thank goodness.
Their feathers are slowly growing back.
 
***********************
 
 
This is the problem I've been having...
I can sing the lyrics to oldies,
remember enough trivia to "win" Jeopardy from my couch,
assist the grandkids with homework
but.....
I can't remember why I just walked into the bedroom!
I guess my train of thought
keeps leaving the station
without me.
😊
 
***********
A haiku for today......
 
My chickens are fat
They love to eat anything
So they remain fat.
(don't judge, it fits the
5, 7, 5 syllable format)
 
And.....
Don't fart in an Apple Store,
There's no Windows
 
And.....
Poop jokes aren't my favorites but
they are a
solid number 2!
 
 
😄